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For a Nony over at the [community profile] cap_ironman  Comment Fic Fest. Prompt: Steve has the belated realization the super soldier serum made his allergies go away. So he gets a kitty. Tony's secretly a cat lover. Insane amounts of cuteness and fluffiness ensues. Steve decides he likes it when Tony gets all paternal and worried about the kitty. Tony decides to work on cat armor. And it turns out Hulk like kitty, too.

George Washington Wants a Snack

Tony Stark steps into the living room only to be greeted by what might be the most adorable scene ever; Steve Rogers holding a tiny, fluffy white kitten up in front of himself and making peek-a-boo faces.

So cute.

“Where’d the new friend come from?” Tony asks.

Steve beams, cuddling the kitten against his chest and looking over at Tony. “I saw this box of free kittens outside the convenience store and I realized that I’m not allergic anymore. I used to sneeze so much I couldn’t even breathe around cats, but the Serum took care of that. He’s cute, right? I always wanted one.”

Yes, yes he’s cute. And the kitten is, too. “It’s going to shed, isn’t it?” he asks, brow quirked because he prefers to keep his love of cats on the down low; it wouldn’t do for anyone to know he was weak towards kittens.

He almost takes it back, though, at the kind of crestfallen expression on Steve’s face. “Probably, yeah. I’ll keep him brushed so it’s not so bad…”

Tony nods and exits the room.

So the kitten becomes a thing. The whole team loves it, even Hulk who grins wide as he holds it carefully and pets it with one huge finger, the kitten nuzzling back at the gentle giant.

“Hulk like kitty,” Hulk declares.

“Looks like he likes you, too,” Steve says happily. “I’m thinking I might name him George. Or maybe Washington.”

“You want to name you cat after a founding father?” Tony asks, looking up from his laptop for the first time since Steve, the kitten, and Hulk intruded on his space.

Steve frowns a bit. “Cats can be patriotic, too, Tony,” he says with a hair of defensiveness.

Tony blinks. “Of course they can, Steve. Soon you’ll have it trained to salute as the flag is raised and play the national anthem on a tiny bugle.”

“Animals can’t play bugles, Tony,” Steve says quite seriously.

“Hulk want bugle.”

Tony isn’t going to dignify any of that with a response. He closes his laptop and stands, leaving to room.

It’s one of those rare afternoons when everyone but Tony has something better to do, someplace to go, and so he’s alone. He wanders into the kitchen only to find George Washington, he never did figure out what Steve actually named the kitten, futilely stretching up against the counter as if it could reach some kind of food.

Tony looks around as if to make sure no one might happen by, then goes over and scoops the kitten up. “Hey there, Mr. President,” he coos, petting the precious thing’s belly. It purrs and Tony smiles. “You want a snack? I’m sure Steve wouldn’t want you breaking your eating schedule but, what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him…”

He searches around a bit until he finds where the kitten snacks are and gives one to the little white fluff ball, then he brings the kitten into the living room where one of those toys on the length of string is. He plays with the kitten, grinning as it pounces uncoordinatedly at its prey.

“I knew you didn’t hate cats,” Steve says from the doorway.

Tony looks like he was caught with his hand in the cookie jar. “Um… You’re hallucinating?”

“Oh, is that what this is? ‘Cause it looks like you’re secretly playing with my cat.”

“Nope, definitely a hallucination,” Tony assures with a sage nod. He gives the kitten a little push towards Steve. “Attack, George Washington. He’s seen too much, we’ll have to eliminate him…”

The kitten mewls and stumbles over to Steve, who scoops the precious feline up. “He’s my attack kitten, Tony, he’d never eliminate me,” Steve says, smiling as the kitten nuzzles his chin and walking nearer. He sits on the couch and settles George in his lap, then glances at Tony before raising one of the kitten’s paws to its head.

A kitten salute; Tony can’t help but let out a noise suspiciously like ‘d’aww’. “Oh my god, I can’t believe you just did that.”

“I thought you’d like it. There’s a tiny bugle coming in the mail, by the way. He might not be able to play it, but he can wear it strapped to a leg.”

“I can’t tell if you’re joking or not,” Tony says, trying not to melt over the idea. He’ll have to get pictures and make Mr. President into a LOLcat…

“You’ll just have to wait and see. Now come over here and pet my cat,” Steve says in that tone that people just don’t argue with. Tony grins and does, scoots over to pet George with Steve, because he doesn’t have the power to resist that adorable kitten and Captain America.

Thankfully, Steve lets Tony save some face and allows him to adore George in private; he just doesn’t have the energy to deal with the ball Spider-Man would have with Tony’s infatuation with the kitten.

He’s become attatched to George Washington. And that’s not a sentence he’ll ever admit to thinking because it just sounds weird. But, now he’s worried about George; what if someone breaks in and takes George hostage? What if they’re out on a mission too long and George misses a meal? What if there’s a fire?

So much could go horribly wrong for dear George…

So, when Steve is away, Tony sneaks George down to his workshop and starts taking the kitten’s measurements. Once he’s done, George finds a nice cozy spot against some of the warm computer equipment to nap and Tony is sketching away on a tablet.

It must have been a while because Steve comes down, stopping behind Tony and Tony didn’t even hear the door open. “You aren’t. Tell me you’re not, tony, because that looks a lot like—”

“Mark zero of George’s armor. I still haven’t quite figured out the computer interface for it, but it’s only a matter of time.”

Tony, he’s a cat.”

“Cat’s are people, too, Steve.”

“No they’re really not. Are you loopy from hunger or something? How long have you been working down here?”

“I’m not loopy, I just— What if something happens to him, Steve?” Tony asks, eyes wide and earnest. “What if something happens to our baby?”

Steve blinks. “Our baby? Really, Tony?”

Tony frowns. “Really. I’m worried about him…”

“So… You’re building a suit of armor to protect ‘our baby’?”

“I am. What, are you trying to say he’s not my baby? He certainly feels like my baby, Steve. Speaking of, I think he’s hungry. It’s your turn to feed him.”

Steve chuckles and scoops up the drowsy kitten. “Alright, I’ll feed him. But I think we need to talk more about this baby thing. And about this armor thing.”

“You’re his papa, I’m his daddy, and my baby gets armor,” Tony says quite seriously.

“So… we’re married now, or did we have him out of wedlock?”

“We had him out of wedlock, but I’m hoping you’ll make an honest man of me soon.”

Steve smiles beatifically. “Okay, Tony.”

“Okay what?”

“Okay, I’ll make an honest man out of you.”

“What, seriously?” Tony asks. Did he just manage to get Steve to propose to him? They aren’t even dating, he didn’t know Steve even liked men, not that Tony ever let semantics keep him from making impulsive decisions before of course.

“Yes, seriously. George deserves to have a stable family life, Tony.”

Tony is maybe beaming a bit. “He does, doesn’t he?”

“Absolutely. But you have to bring your love of cats out of the closet; you wouldn’t want your baby to feel like you’re ashamed of him.”

“Oh, of course,” Tony assures. He reaches out and tugs Steve closer by the shirt and angles his face up. Steve leans in and meets him in a kiss. Between them, George Washington is purring and making happy toes.

At their wedding, George Washington Stark-Rogers is the ring bearer of course and he is too cute in his little tux.

on 2011-08-20 05:43 am (UTC)
sara_wolf: (Default)
Posted by [personal profile] sara_wolf
Of course, Tony would immediately jump to "the cat must have armor". This is hilarious.

July 2011

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